Khadijah VanBrakle is a proud New Mexican, mother of five, and Black Muslim woman. She is active in running her local SCBWI chapter and as an administrator at the Black Creators HQ, and she was also selected for the Highlights Foundation Muslim Storytellers Fellowship in 2021. She lives in Albuquerque with her family.

How a Young Adult Author Stays Motivated To Tell Her Stories

Writing books was never on my to-do list.

Growing up in Canada, I was an avid reader but my love of books didn’t lead me to major in English or creative writing in college. As someone with an undergraduate degree in Accounting and a half-finished MBA, I came to writing later in life.

I became interested in becoming an author in 2012. It was my new year’s resolution to complete the first draft of an idea I had for a middle grade fantasy. I took a continuing education class at the University of New Mexico, where I was introduced to and became a member of the New Mexico chapter of the Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators.

I found my people.

The First Draft & Debut

That year, it took me nine long months of Sundays to finish my first manuscript. It was 25,000 words and I was proud. I went to the library and read books by Tamora Pierce and Karen Cushman. These books opened my eyes. I needed to learn how to tell a compelling story, have well-constructed world building and give the reader a satisfying ending.

Looking back at my first-ever and only attempt at a middle grade fantasy, I’m not sorry I wrote such terrible prose because it sparked my writing bug. I started taking writing classes and reading craft books. I even wrote three picture books, all while continuing to improve my craft.

In 2017, my youngest daughter was a freshman in high school when we discovered at a local Albuquerque library that there wasn’t one traditionally-published book that featured a Black American Muslim main character in contemporary young adult literature. That year, she also read Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson in her Language Arts class.

I also read Anderson’s novel, as well as YA books by Tiffany D. Jackson, Jennifer Niven, and Erika L. Sanchez. These amazing stories gave me the permission I needed to write about the more difficult issues teens face in my own coming-of-age novels.

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When writing my debut, Fatima Tate Takes The Cake, I took my time. There wasn’t anyone waiting for me to finish it. It took about eighteen months of writing, revising, and a complete overhaul for me to be satisfied with what I had on the page. I was determined to have it in the best shape possible before querying.

I started seriously looking for an agent in October 2019 and signed with my kick-ass agent, Kristina Perez, in February 2020. Once I went on submission with Fatima Tate Takes The Cake exactly a year later, I had an idea for my next story which ended up as the second book in my Holiday House book deal.

Crushing Imposter Syndrome

Doubts filled my brain.

Imposter syndrome reminded me every day that my education and career experience was better suited to balance sheets and income statements, not writing.

Now that I knew the level of storytelling traditional publishing expected, I didn’t know if I could write something else I was proud of. Another story that featured a teen who shared my dual marginalization and also had universal themes and appeal.

I forced myself to find writing resources to crush my imposter syndrome.

Story Genius by Lisa Cron is my rock.

I love writing character-driven stories and using the methods in Lisa Cron’s craft book helped me get to know the main character in my second novel. It led me to dive deep into the protagonist’s misbelief and even had me writing scenes that happened before the first chapter.

Story Genius encourages authors to do a ton of pre-work, including creating a scene card for each scene in the story before you start writing. Since drafting is my least favorite part of the process, this method is a perfect match for me.

I got organized.

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Getting Organized and Letting the First Draft Flow

Using a monthly planner, I made a schedule for each writing task. I gave myself very reasonable daily goals and even had scheduled days off every week.

Even now, I’m not the type of writer who can edit as I draft. I’ve given myself permission to overuse favorite words and leave fill-in-the blanks for names in my preliminary drafts, knowing that I will fix those things later. Keeping a running list of “fix in revision” items while I create helps me get the words on the page.

I have the question, “Why does this story mean so much to me?” on an index card on my desk and refer back to it every day. I never want another Black American teen from my faith community to look for and not be able to find young adult books with a main character that looks like them and/or doesn’t share their lived experience.

Reminding myself of these things gives me fuel to keep imposter syndrome in check.

With a second, contemporary YA novel, My Perfect Family, releasing July 1, 2025, I’m proud I was able to overcome nagging doubts. This book was inspired by my love of the fraught mother/daughter relationships in the Gilmore Girls but follows a fractured Black American Muslim family.

Not giving in and fighting through imposter syndrome was a valuable lesson I had to learn. And if this Accountant/Young Adult author can do it, anyone can.