GUEST POST BY GINA DEMILLO WAGNER

Virginia Woolf famously said a woman must have money and a room of her own in order to write. But today, most women I know need more than that. They’re juggling full-time work and side hustles with the demands of family, friendships, caregiving, household management, and (if they’re lucky) self-care. Finding the financial stability and safe space to create a book is tougher than ever.

I wrote my debut memoir Forces of Nature while I was working full-time at a high-stress corporate job and parenting young children. A writing routine felt like a luxury I couldn’t afford. My writing practice had to fit into the margins of life. I longed for spacious days where I could sink into a project for hours without interruption. But I knew if I waited for those openings to appear on my schedule, I’d never finish the book.

To make my book dream a reality, I adjusted my expectations, got creative with my approach, and found ways to write without sacrificing too much sleep or personal time with my family. Here are a few tricks I learned that might help you too:

Write in 15-minute sprints.

I had to let go of the idea that I need a large block of time to write something meaningful. Instead, I grabbed every fifteen-minute chunk of time I could find. I wrote before work and during lunch breaks. If a meeting ended early or was canceled, I reclaimed that time to write. In the evenings, I wrote while dinner was in the oven or when my kids were doing their homework.

Keep a notebook or recording device handy at all times.

I couldn’t use my employer’s computer for my personal writing, so I kept a legal pad by my desk to jot down ideas. I wrote whole chapters by hand. I emailed myself bits of research from my smart phone. Sometimes, I stood outside the office in the smoking area and used voice-to-text in my phone’s Notes app to talk through scenes.

Replace doom scrolling with writing.

Think about all the places you distract yourself with your phone, and consider using that idle time for writing instead. I wrote scenes on the sidelines of my kid’s soccer practice and in the waiting rooms of doctors’ offices. I recorded ideas while waiting in carpool lines. I brought my personal laptop on business trips and wrote on the plane.

Don’t think. Just write.

Too often, we stand in our own way by overthinking our writing or expecting perfection. One way to get around this is to interrupt your inner critic and put pen to paper. Set a timer for 10 minutes and write without pausing. Or write first thing in the morning while your mind is clear. My favorite thing to do is wake up before my family, make coffee, and write in the notebook that I keep by my bed for thirty minutes or an hour. I don’t touch my phone or load the dishwasher or even brush my teeth. I just write nonstop. Later, I’ll type what I’ve written on my computer, and the act of transcription serves as a first revision.

Use some vacation days or flex time.

If your job offers personal days, use them. When my manuscript was 75 percent complete, I burned some PTO, checked myself into a cabin with no TV or Wi-Fi, and wrote for hours on end. It was the final push I needed to complete the book. Other times, I’d take a half day off and write while my kids were at school. If you don’t have vacation days, see if your company will let you adjust your schedule so that you have a morning free to write. Maybe you can work four 10-hour days a week instead of five 8-hour days.

A word of caution:

Throughout the process, be kind to yourself. Writing a book while working full-time and juggling life’s demands can lead to burnout. There’s a fine line between being motivated and falling prey to hustle culture.

Let go of the idea that you must write every single day or meet a daily word count quota to be successful. Listen to your body’s needs for rest (physical rest and mental rest). That might mean replacing some writing sessions with Netflix or sleeping late. Who knows? You might find inspiration in your dreams.

I’ve been writing for many years, and I still don’t have a room of my own to create. But these days I do have a more spacious relationship with my writing. I work from home and have more flexibility in my schedule, yet I’ve retained the ability to write during small windows between meetings and freelance assignments. I can drop quickly into my work and accomplish a lot in a short timeframe.

Most of all, I’ve learned to trust myself. I know from experience that if an idea or story is important, I’ll find a way to bring it to life on the page.

About Gina

Gina DeMillo Wagner is the author of Forces of Nature, (May 14, 2024; Running Wild Press). Her writing has been featured in The New York Times, The Washington Post, Memoir Magazine, Modern Loss, Self, Outside, CRAFT Literary, and other publications. She has been honored with a 2024 Yaddo residency and is a winner of the CRAFT Creative Nonfiction Award, and her memoir was longlisted for the 2022 SFWP Literary prize. Gina has a master’s degree in journalism and is cofounder of Watershed creative writing and art workshops. She lives and works near Boulder, Colorado. You can visit her online at ginadwagner.com.

Forces of Nature by Gina De Millo Wagner

Gina De Millo Wagner’s brother Alan had a rare genetic disorder that caused him to veer from loving to violent. When Alan died suddenly, Gina was pulled away from the safety of her adult life and thrust back into a family she had been estranged from for nearly ten years. Forces of Nature follows this rewinding of the past, exploring Gina’s caregiving journey and reckoning with complicated grief, plus Alan’s Christmas-themed funeral, and an investigation into his cause of death. It’s a personal story that asks universal questions: How much of ourselves should we sacrifice to those we love? And, what forces shape our sense of family and home?

Read a sample of the book here.

Buy the book now: Bookshop.org | Amazon | Barnes & Noble